


light me up (and i fall for you)

by moonlitsoul



Category: TharnType the Series (TV), เกลียดนักมาเป็นที่รักกันซะดีๆ | TharnType: The Series (TV) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Not Beta Read, idk what to tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:35:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25110247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonlitsoul/pseuds/moonlitsoul
Summary: Gulf, a straight-A student lost a bet with his friends and now he needs his sister's best friend and her PhD classmate, Mew, to act as his fake boyfriend on their upcoming graduation ball. It should be easy...if only he could stop his feelings from showing especially when Mew only looks at him like a kid.
Relationships: Mew Suppasit Jongcheveevat/Gulf Kanawut Traipipattanapong
Comments: 18
Kudos: 367





	light me up (and i fall for you)

  


It’s such a stupid thing.

Come to think of it, it was really Gulf’s fault for leaving an opening. It has been a known fact throughout the campus that Gulf Kanawut of Class 4-1, the university’s former Moon, was unfortunately taken. He always pulled the boyfriend card for every social invite he’s gotten, every suitor who wanted to pursue him, just to avoid all the parties and people to focus on his studies. Their perfect, overachiever class representative has a hot older boyfriend and Gulf didn’t have any other time to spare for them.

Well, now, Gulf really hoped he had one. Groaning, he rolled on his bed as he reached for his phone. He stared at the last message he received from his friends’ group chat.

_I wonder if he’s really hot as you say…if he really exists ;)_

His head started to ache as he recalled the cause of his dilemma. He forgot Pim’s birthday; he went to her house after buying her an expensive gift, only to find himself in a small group party playing truth or dare. 

“I dare you to bring your ever-missing boyfriend to our grad ball,” Pim said. 

Gulf should have known that Pim was really, really mad at him for forgetting her birthday. He should have picked truth. He should have known that Pim never played fair. 

Before he could say that his boyfriend could not make it, Pim added, “He’s coming back tomorrow to Bangkok from his trip, right? He’s here on Friday then.” 

And this was why Gulf was stewing with his thoughts on a Wednesday night in his room. It’s all because he couldn’t shut his mouth about having a boyfriend and him being back here—because of the lies he spouted which were coming back to bite him in the ass. 

Okay, so he has two options. One, he wouldn’t attend the ball—even if he was the head of the committee and his parents already saw the invitation. Or second, he would attend with his made-up boyfriend and hope for the best. 

Pulling his hair in frustration, he burrowed his face into his pillow and wondered why he ever thought that it was a good idea befriending Pim. 

“Gulf, dinner!” He heard his older sister shouted and Gulf welcomed the distraction it gave him. 

Scrunching his face once more, he pushed himself up, and changed into his favorite oversized shirt and boxer shorts. While changing, he thought of the things about his boyfriend that he told Pim.

_“He’s taking his PhD degree while working, that’s why he’s so busy.”_

_“He’s almost the same height as me, 182 cm tall.”_

_“He has a dog named Chopper.”_

_“He has beautiful, big brown eyes.”_

_“He doesn’t like pork. But he eats crispy pork with basil with me.”_

_“He’s seven years older than me. He’s 29.”_

God, what a fool. Where could he find someone that suited all of these criteria? Within two days? He scratched his head in frustration before leaving his room. 

-

This was not really his day, Gulf realized, as he stayed rooted where he stood and looked at the addition in their dining room.

“Gulf, what are you standing there for? Come, eat! Mew brought dinner,” his older sister said as she arranged the plates on the table. 

Damn him, this…this _Mew Suppasit._

He has been his sister’s friend for a year now. They met in grad school where they were both taking their PhDs. He had been hanging out with them, and Gulf should have expected to see him tonight because Mew’s flight back to Bangkok was earlier this morning. 

Oh, his made-up boyfriend? He was based on Mew. All of his criteria earlier were his truths. But the most frustrating thing in this situation was, he made up a boyfriend based on someone he has been crushing on and would probably run if he knew about Gulf’s feelings. 

“Hi Nong,” he heard Mew say and Gulf continued to stare at him like a dork. Mew smiled, his eyes were a pair of crescents when he said, “Nice shirt.” 

Gulf then glared at him. “P’Mew!” 

“What? I remember I bought it for you!” 

Gulf groaned. He turned and dashed back to his room and swiftly dived into his bed—and willed his heart to stop its _stupid, not needed,_ juddering heartbeats just because of one Mew Suppasit. 

-

“If I see you when I turn around, I swear I will throw this pillow on you, P’Mew,” Gulf grumbled; he heard Mew laugh and the sound of his door clicking. He got up and flung his pillow on the still laughing Mew who caught it on reflex.

“Ah, what temper, Nong.”

Gulf frowned and crossed his hands. He stayed silent, still sitting on his bed as Mew looked around his room and walked towards his study table where his notebooks were tossed messily.

His P’ was wearing a simple white shirt and jeans and it should have been a crime to look this good in such a simple attire. Gulf tried hard not to stare at his unbuttoned chest or his arms which were displayed by his rolled sleeves. They were... _so veiny._

“Hmmm, this is quite hard,” he said after snooping around. Gulf rolled his eyes. Mew’s homework must have been a lot harder than his. He was the one studying for a doctoral degree. “What are you doing here?”

Mew looked back at him thoughtfully before running his left hand through his hair.

Gulf glared at him harder. He hated the way he could see P’Mew’s veiny hand before it disappeared in the curtains of his black hair. The strands which fell into Mew’s eyes made him even more handsome. Ugh, why did his crush have to be this insufferable? Why did he have to look like _that_?

Mew pulled the chair next to him. “Why, you don’t want me to hang out with you?”

“Hangout, my ass,” Gulf replied. “We never hang out here in _my_ room, P’Mew. We only fool around.”

Gulf regretted his words and their implication as soon as they left his lips. “I mean—”

Mew’s eyes were twinkling with laughter and Gulf hated how easily this man could make him blush. He’s a straight-A student who was known for his cold, snippy persona for fuck’s sake.

“What’s bothering you, Gulf?” Mew asked and he smiled openly. “And don’t tell me it’s nothing because the last time you had this temper, it’s because you found out that I forgot to bring you the shirt you’re wearing right now.”

“Well, it’s stupid.” Because it was really stupid, Gulf thought as he broke their eye contact and looked down. “I hate Pim.”

Mew hummed. “Why?” 

“Because she’s stupid.”

“Really?”

“And you’re stupid!”

Mew laughed again. “Come on, I’ll help you with whatever stupid thing that is bothering you so much that you keep on sulking adorably like this.”

Gulf lifted his head indignantly. “I’m not sulking! And I’m not...not adorable.”

“Uhuh. Out with it, Nong Gulf.”

Gulf stayed silent and tried to think how he could get out of this situation. He wanted Mew to go now, leave his room, leave his life, and leave him to suffer that damn grad ball alone.

But—

_What if?_

Sighing, he glanced at Mew again. “Don’t laugh,” Gulf started. “And promise me, you’ll say yes.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

“You have to promise or I won’t tell you!”

Mew gave in to him earlier than expected. “Okay, promise.”

A beat passed.

“I need you to be my boyfriend,” Gulf said, and the surprise that crossed Mew’s face made him pause. “I—I mean, my, you know, my f-fake boyfriend.”

He kept looking at him and once Mew might have processed what he uttered, the latter smiled. “I could have been yours earlier but I never thought you like me that much, Gulf, with the way you’re always frowning at me, kitten.”

Gulf internally cursed and prayed to Buddha that his face wasn’t as red as a tomato now because what the hell, this was not the answer he was expecting.

Also, what? _He could have been mine?_

God, if this was Mew teasing him now and being a flirt at the same time, what more if he was his boyfriend? _Does P’Mew flirt like this with his lovers?_ _Does he look like this whenever he looks at them?_

Gulf shook his head and tried to explain his side. “It’s because of that stupid dare of Pim,” he told. “She wants me to bring my boyfriend on the grad ball and I kind of...lie that I have one.”

“Uhuh. How does one kind of lie, Nong?”

“It’s an out okay! I need to do so many things and they keep asking me everywhere and having a boyfriend seems like magic because the next thing I know they are leaving me alone and you know how much I wanted to participate in school activities too, since I enjoy them and the plus points are good enough especially the student org—wait I’m rambling, aren’t I?—I just told them I have one and now, I need one and you need to help me, P’Mew.”

Mew reached for his cheeks and pinched it which Gulf failed to avoid at his irritation. “P’Mew! I’m not joking!”

“I know,” Mew huffed. “I just can’t believe you ask me. You need to have other friends, Nong.”

“I have friends,” Gulf replied defensively. “But, they’re not you.”

Mew raised an eyebrow and Gulf knew he had to give merit to a temple tomorrow or something because his luck was so bad he could cry.

“I told them that my boyfriend is older than me,” he uttered, the embarrassment creeping in.

Another beat and Gulf hated how Mew waited as if he knew Gulf would tell him more.

“That he’s 29.”

Mew appeared even more pensive. “That’s very specific.”

“I have to be specific! Else, they might have known I was lying!” Gulf huffed. “Also, that he’s studying for a PhD.”

He could see the cloud of confusion settled in Mew’s eyes before he continued, “That he’s got a dog named Chopper and he’s tall and he’s...he’s you.”

Gulf was waiting for his P’ to laugh at him and tease him even more and ask him how long he’s been crushing on Mew and— _What have I done?_

“Okay, but what’s in it for me?”

Gulf tilted his head. “What do you mean okay? Okay-okay? Meaning you’ll help me? You’ll be my boyfriend?”

“Yes,” Mew answered. He stood up and Gulf lifted his head to look up to the now standing Mew. “But when it’s my time to ask you for something, promise me you’ll say yes too.”

His eyes were soft as he looked at Gulf and the way his heart was beating inside his chest made it difficult to breathe. He nodded eagerly. “Deal.”

His crush agreed to be his boyfriend, no matter that it’s a fake arrangement and he was so close, his perfume was filling Gulf’s lungs and he was just...all over Gulf even without touch that it’s frightening, somehow.

Mew smiled and ruffled his hair. “What’s the color of your tux on Fri?”

“Black,” Gulf whispered, his voice tiny and breathy. _His veiny hand is on my head and it’s still on my head, goddamnit, did I shampoo my hair today?_

Mew nodded, his hand stopped petting his head and Gulf almost whined at the loss of contact. “Then, I’ll pick you up on Friday then,” Mew said and before he could leave the room he smiled at Gulf teasingly and winked. _“Boyfriend.”_

-

Gulf was having lunch with Pim at their faculty’s cafeteria. They were seated at their favorite table for the past three years—near to the open area, but not far enough from the food stalls. The buzz was not as heavy as the regular school days as the teachers only conducted morning classes to give way to the preparations for the activity tomorrow. Pim was eyeing him weirdly as she inhaled her food. She took a sip of her soda drink and cleared her throat.

“You didn’t reply yesterday.”

Gulf shrugged and continued eating his omelette on rice. “I was with P’Mew.”

Pim squinted her eyes. “Don’t tell me he’s not coming?”

Gulf reached for his water and shook his head. “He is.”

He should have expected Pim’s different reaction to his words—the shriek which came from her almost made his ear bleed. Some students even looked at them in surprise.

_“He’s going? He’s real? My god, I can’t believe your boyfriend’s real!”_

Gulf hid his smile behind his glass. _I mean, same._ The sound of his phone pinging stopped Pim’s succeeding exclamations.

It’s a facebook message from Mew.

“Who’s that? Is it him?” Pim asked, her neck stretching longer to take a peak on his phone.

Gulf couldn’t help the smile when he saw what Mew sent. It was a picture of his hands carrying a clothing bag. _“Brought a black tux as well. See you tomorrow, kitten,”_ was the text that followed. He’s sure his face looked silly as he reread the message and sighed at the photo for far longer than necessary.

“Ugh,” he heard Pim say. _“Couples.”_

-

 _God, if P’Grace doesn’t stop her blabbering—_ was Gulf’s thoughts as he fixed his bowtie. She was actually cool by the idea of Mew going with him to his graduation ball but the knowing glances she gave him were not welcome, thank you very much. He knew that her sister might have realized his crush on her classmate earlier and while she never teased him for it, she still made some chances for them to spend time together, _alone,_ during the duration of his crush. Gulf didn’t know whether to love or hate her for it.

He sighed and caught the litany of her sister—"Nong, stop taking too much time; your date will be here soon and I still need to take pictures of you then both of you together!”

Knowing that he might never hear the end of it, he left his room after one last look at himself—he looked quite handsome, if he’d be honest, the tux fit him perfectly, the sheen of it complimenting the shine of his wavy hair which was styled by her sister earlier. Upon closing the door, he heard a car’s engine dying.

“Gulf, he’s here!”

And if he was not nervous five minutes earlier, then he might have pissed himself with the way his nerves were acting up now. His heart was pounding like crazy, he could have been experiencing a symptom of a heart attack.

Once he arrived at their living room, P’Mew was already there.

And he was Prince Charming personified. Gulf couldn’t help the little gasp he made when he saw him; he was very handsome, wearing a matching tux and a black bowtie. His hair was perfect and he seemed to make the room smaller the way he commanded everyone’s attention. When Mew turned and saw him, the smile that he gave Gulf made his knees weak.

“Ready, boyfriend?”

Gulf saw his sister mouthed at him, _‘Boyfriend?’_ which he ignored to reply to his P’. He nodded and before they could move on, his sister called their attention though she’s obviously still in a cloud of confusion. “Pictures!”

Mew walked towards Gulf while he stood his ground, transfixed. The sound of Grace’s camera filled the silence between them.

“Can I touch you?”

Gulf did not expect him to whisper to his ear, but his brain was still not working so he just nodded. He felt him moved closer until there was no space between them, and Gulf could smell him. When Mew put his arm over Gulf’s shoulder, he took a chance to glance at him. He could not quite believe this was happening.

“Nong, stop looking at Mew. Look here and smile.”

Gulf cut his dumb staring and looked back at her sister. His face was heating up and he wanted to glare so much, wanted to appear unaffected but he could not help smiling widely like Mew was doing, his hand leaving his shoulder to hold Gulf’s hand. They looked at each other, unintended but welcome, and smiled even more widely, this time to each other. 

Gulf was sure he was falling in love more and more, as spoken loudly by the heart that was captured by the man in front of him.

-

“Holy shit, he’s really real!”

Pim’s voice brought their friends’ attention to Gulf and Mew as they walked towards them. They were all dolled up and dapper and they were ogling at Gulf’s boyfriend like he was a celebrity coming to town.

Gulf cleared his throat and circled his arm to Mew’s. “This is P’Mew, my boyfriend. P’, these are my friends, Pim, Gun—her brother, and Saint.”

Mew wai-ed at them all which the group returned rather dazedly. Fifteen minutes in, his friends were listening to whatever Mew was saying, hanging on his words like ducklings who found their mother. And Gulf could not believe how Mew could charm them so fast, how perfect he was. (And how bad it was to think he was really Gulf’s.)

The program commenced and Gulf went to the stage once to deliver a short speech as the student body’s former president. The dinner and other formalities were done in a flash and the band started the dance. The music was loud and uplifting and everyone seemed to be having a good time. His P’ was holding his drink when he pulled him to the dance floor.

Gulf faltered when the music changed to slow dance and the dance floor was transformed into a place of pairs having their moments clinging like koalas. He was holding Mew’s hand when the latter noticed his hesitation.

“Aren’t we going to dance?”

Gulf heard him say before he was pulled into his arms. Mew’s hands were both warm on the sides of his waist. Feeling braver, Gulf put both of his arms on his shoulder and started swaying with the music. He closed his eyes and opened them when he felt Mew’s forehead on his. They held each other’s eyes as they smiled at each other.

_“If this is love...”_

The song was new but quite fitting and Gulf’s heart was soaring with the notes. They were close to hugging now and the comfort he found as he fitted into Mew’s arms scared him.

His friends might be watching them, or everybody else, but Gulf didn’t care. He was too happy to care. His reputation as the school’s coldest prince was being washed by the drain and by the number of times his cheek twitched from smiling too much but he couldn't care less.

It was a magical moment and he would savor the hell out of it. He would be a happy koala, damn it, and so he tugged Mew even closer until his head was against his neck until the spaces between them ceased to exist.

When Mew held him as tight, Gulf’s heart was stuttering.

“We really do look like boyfriends, Nong,” he heard him whisper and Gulf did not reply immediately. A croon from the singer was heard before he nodded.

“You look really handsome tonight, Gulf.”

He didn’t know whether it was because of the song, or their position, or because his P’ has convinced everyone by now because he was a really, really good liar, but Gulf’s throat tightened as his chest swelled with sadness.

“Not as handsome as you, P’Mew,” he whispered against his shoulder, and Mew chuckled in response.

_But—_

He still got the whole night, didn’t he? He could pretend that his longtime crush was his and every word he said was true.

So, when it was time to go back to reality, he got enough happy pills stored in his chest to relieve the pain.

_Of this not being real. Of his P’Mew not being really his._

He knew that, knew it enough like a lesson memorized—falling inevitably in love with Mew would either result in two things. And while he was thinking this might result in a happy ending, Gulf still thought himself smart to know how to fall deeper with eyes wide open, and not eliminate the probability of a heartbreak.

But for now, he hugged him closer, until his heart was beating next to his, and let him feel the weight of his unwavering feelings. 

-

They brought the party to Gulf’s condo when it hit past eleven. They already planned this and after asking permission from his parents, Gulf’s unit was equipped with food and beverage, but with limited alcohol. It was just a humble one-bedroom unit but he never brought anyone here, even his P’. 

Everyone dressed down and sat across each other on the floor at the center of the room. Gun was busy fiddling with his phone, probably still flirting with his boyfriend who promised to pick him up at one. Pim was busy preparing snacks and drinks with Saint. 

His P’Mew was still outside, answering a call he received after he had driven them here. Gulf hoped he would stay with them for more hours. When Mew went inside and sat down with them, Gulf was relieved.

“Who’s up for truth or dare?” 

Everyone shrugged. They were all half-drunk from the party earlier, well, except Mew who was their driver earlier.

“If you don’t want to do or say anything, you have to drink.” Pim spun the bottle and it stopped at Gun. The latter removed his sight from his phone and said, “Truth.”

Saint cleared his throat. They were a small group and it was no fun to actually do this without their boyfriends. “Excuse me Pim,” he started. “P’Gun, have far had you gone with P’Off?”

Pim scrunched her nose. “Ew, that’s my brother, Saint!” 

Gun blushed prettily and reached for a drink. 

“Coward,” Saint teased. 

Gulf couldn’t imagine being asked that question with Mew beside him. It would be a blatant tell if he misspoke and every effort to make them believe done by his P’ would go down the drain if he made a slip. 

The next one was Saint who answered dare. Gun happily asked him to call his boyfriend, Zee, their senior who graduated last year and was busy with his studio and to tell him something sexy.

Saint moved to get his phone and when the other line picked up, he told bravely: “Hey Zee, I miss you and your kisses.”

Gun raised his eyebrows and Pim was covering her mouth as she tried not to laugh. Gulf watched Mew in the corner of his eyes. He was swinging his glass as he watched his friends amusedly.

“Your kisses... _there._ ” Saint continued and hung up. They all laughed when they heard a sputter from the other line. 

When it was finally his turn, Gulf hoped to get a non-rated question but he should not _not_ expect anything from his friends. 

“What’s your favorite body part of P’Mew?”

That’s easy. Gulf glanced at Mew and smiled at him. “His eyes.”

Pim rolled her eyes and exclaimed, “The rated version, Gulf. Don’t be a chicken.” 

Gulf contemplated just drinking this one out but he knew the next one would be more brutal if he tried to escape. “His...hands.”

Saint gave him a pointed look, his eyes twinkling. “Really? We wonder why...”

Gulf grumbled. “This is unfair, why do I have to answer this many questions?” 

Gun looked in Mew's direction. “You want to know why, right, P’?”

_Fuck._

Mew chuckled and looked at Gulf expectantly. 

“Because...,” Gulf started. He could feel the rush of blood from his ears to his cheeks. “Because of his veins?”

Saint squealed. “Is that a question?”

Gulf tried to avoid Mew’s eyes. _God, why are they my friends?_ “Because he’s got veiny hands...and arms.” Everyone squealed and clapped as Gulf glared at them. 

Mew smirked and downed his drink, his eyes still not leaving Gulf. He then removed his blazer, his bowtie, undid the first two buttons and _fuck_ , rolled his sleeves. His friends screamed and Gulf wanted to join but he tried so, so hard not to.

As if planned, the bottle stopped at Mew next. 

“Dare,” Mew replied. Gulf glared at him and Mew mouthed, “What?”

Pim laughed, her thoughts seemed to be so much in cloud nine, and choosing from the choices was very hard for her. “Hmm...what should we ask P’Mew?” 

Gun snickered. “Ask P’ to get his hands on Gulf since our Nong seems to like them very much.”

“What!” Gulf exclaimed; he really could not believe his friends. 

“Then I dare you P’Mew to princess carry your precious boyfriend around from there then back here,” Pim said, her hands pointed around the perimeter of the whole unit. 

Gulf hoped Mew would just drink because this was so embarrassing. But his P’, being an overachiever that he was, stood up and crouched down to lift him up. Gulf’s hands automatically wound up around his neck for balance. He heard his friends hollering but Gulf’s eyes were arrested as Mew looked at him, his face was as close when they were dancing earlier. Gulf’s heart began hammering inside his chest. Mew carried him as if he weighed nothing and _god if this wasn’t a turn on._

Gulf was already blushing so hard when Mew started walking around the room, his breath stable as if he was used to carrying his weight. Gulf cleared his throat and whispered, “At least they didn’t dare you to kiss me.”

Mew looked back at him as they closed the last span of the room. “You think I won’t do it?”

Gulf did not have any time to think of an answer as he was placed back to his seat and his P’ sat next to him, a smile on his face but his face still unreadable. 

After that, they went another round of truth or dare until everyone stopped the game just to drink and enjoy the flow of conversation. An hour passed and Saint was called by his boyfriend. Mew helped him flag a taxi. The siblings were picked up next by Gun’s boyfriend, and before Pim hopped inside the car, she pulled Gulf to whisper, “Your man’s hot, smart, and a proper gentleman. Gulf, you’re so lucky.”

He was lucky indeed but he wanted to be _luckier_ to make him officially his. 

-

“I’m sorry if they’re too much,” Gulf said once they went back inside the unit. Mew shook his head. “They’re fun.”

Gulf started cleaning up and Mew helped him. There was sudden awkwardness since it was only the two of them. Gulf put away the trash and Mew was waiting for him when he came back. 

“It’s almost 2 am,” Gulf said. “Uhm, you can stay here if you want, P’.” There was silence for two seconds and Gulf continued. “No need to tire yourself even more to drive back home.”

Mew sighed and nodded, “If that’s okay with you, then let me crash here.” 

Gulf smiled and his P’ smiled back. The awkwardness was killing him as they were not this awkward previously. 

“Uhm, thank you, P’Mew,” Gulf said. “For helping me tonight.”

Mew smiled wider and his breath caught as the latter walked closer and patted his hair. “I enjoyed myself.”

Gulf bit his lip, his thoughts halting with the words spoken. What did they mean? Should he hope for...Wait, what if he was just being friendly?

He was still lost in his thoughts when Mew started to remove his clothes and Gulf tried not to look at the skin being shown in front of him. “I’ll go ahead and shower first, is that okay?”

“Yes,” Gulf nodded, his cheeks were burning again. _Yes to anything, P’._

Mew waited for him to catch up and Gulf cleared his throat, “Let me get you some clothes. There is spare everything in the bathroom, P’,” he said, trying not to stutter and when he went out of Mew’s sight, he did not see the smile that registered in Mew’s face. 

-

After Gulf showered and felt like himself again, he went inside the bedroom where he found his P’ in the same position he last saw him before he took a shower. He was sitting on the right side of the bed, occupied by his phone. He was wearing Gulf’s largest sleeveless tank top but the fabric was still stretched especially in his chest. 

Gulf started to regret offering him to stay because how could he sleep next to him looking like that? He had dreamt of this many times and the reality did not even begin to compare. 

Gulf reached for the hairdryer and went towards the bed where he could plug the device next to his charging phone. He could feel Mew following him with his gaze as he sat on the floor beside the bed and turned on the dryer. 

The sound of it filling the room so Gulf did not hear Mew coming closer to him until a hand reached for the dryer in his hand. 

He turned his head back and saw his P’ sitting on the bed, his legs next to him enclosing Gulf in the center. Without a word, Mew’s other hand started combing his wet hair with his fingers and drying his hair for him. 

He turned his head again to the front as he let Mew indulge himself to the task. Gulf closed his eyes as Mew’s fingers ran through his hair multiple times until his hair was all dry. Mew switched the dryer off and even unplugged it for him. 

He scooted over and Gulf hopped in the bed after turning off the lights and leaving the lamp open and sat next to him. Mew’s hand pushed a strand of hair that fell on his face away and stayed there for a long moment, brushing in random directions. “Your hair is always so soft,” he said. 

Gulf moved closer until he could feel his shoulder next to him. He was still facing Mew, his body angled sideways like him. 

Gulf closed his eyes, basking at the moment. He felt like a contented cat and he wanted this not to end. 

“I consider myself pretty smart but I could never guess what you’re thinking, Nong,” he heard him say, his voice low and soft. 

Gulf opened his eyes and looked back at the eyes staring at him. The night light highlighted the angles of Mew’s face which should not make him even more attractive, but it did. 

With nothing but a sudden bout of courage, Gulf moved even closer. “Guess what I’m thinking P’Mew?” 

The silence stretched for a moment too long before Mew continued. 

“Do you want me to be honest?”

Gulf nodded. 

“Promise, you won’t be mad?”

Gulf could hear his own breath quickened. “Try.”

“I think that you want to kiss me,” Mew said, the hand which was petting his hair earlier went down to cup his face. 

Gulf sighed, closing his eyes again for a moment and rubbed his cheeks into the warmth of his palm.

“Am I right?”

Gulf nodded as he blinked back at Mew. “Will you kiss me just because I said yes?” He asked, his voice trembled a little at the end of his question.

“I’m thinking that if I kiss you, you might think less of me,” Mew said. “That if I kiss you right now, you’ll run away in the morning.”

Gulf opened his mouth absently as his eyes went down to stare at Mew’s lips. 

“Because if I kiss you right now, Gulf, this will be real.”

“What’s this then, P’Mew?” He asked, looking to his eyes again because even if his brain was beginning to get mushy, he wanted to hear some kind of affirmation, _anything,_ before he dived even deeper. His heart was yearning and yearning inside of his chest and with every inhale was a prayer for the heart next to him to beat at the same tempo of his. 

Mew’s palm which was cupping his cheek moved to trace the line of his bottom lip.

_“Us.”_

Gulf heart skipped. 

“I had you promise me that if I ask you for something in exchange for being your fake boyfriend, you’ll say yes to whatever I’ll ask of you,” he heard him say, his voice was softer but heavier. “But this time, I want your truth. Don’t say yes if you don’t really want to.”

For the whole duration of his unrequited love, Gulf had imagined this a thousand times in his head. This had occupied his daydreams and his thoughts before sleeping. He might have convinced himself of the scenes in his head only to be grounded by the reality where the space between them was defined by nothing but a P’-Nong relationship. 

And now, here he was; the space between them was waiting to be redefined by his answer. Gulf knew he would rather kill himself than say no. “Ask me, then.”

Mew’s thumb dipped even more in the valley of Gulf’s lower lip. “Can I kiss you now, Gulf?”

“Yes,” Gulf answered, the word flew out in one breathe as if it was waiting for thirteen months too long. His hands reached Mew’s face to pull him closer until they were just breathing each other’s exhales. 

Gulf tilted his head and kissed him. 

There were no fireworks, no background music like the song back in the party, no hint of magic in his ears, just the sound of the earliest morning and the noise they made to adjust to the kiss. 

He was warm all over, his heart expanding with the love he then poured into the kiss. He felt Mew smile and Gulf sighed. It’s like coming home. 

His P’ kissed like kissing was a skill he already mastered and Gulf was a novice he was patiently teaching. His lips moved tenderly, nipping, softly threading the flow they started, until he coaxed for Gulf to open his mouth a bit more. He then rendered the tide to a faster rhythm and his lips were moving and the hand on Gulf’s neck guided his head to the angle where Mew could kiss him deeper. 

He was forgetting how to breathe but Gulf would not give up with this lesson. He took notes and began to lead the kiss, his fingers gripping Mew’s hair with a random level of strength. When his tongue found Mew’s, the latter groaned and it made Gulf quivered to his toes. 

Mew abruptly broke the kiss, their foreheads touching, but Gulf’s lips followed Mew’s own lips but the latter pulled away a little bit. So, with the courage of holding this person’s heart in his hands, he still crossed the distance between them and started kissing Mew from his cheeks to his neck, his hand reaching the end of his shirt. 

“Gulf,” he heard him say, his voice raspy and so, so sexy. Gulf hummed as he traced the scent of him on his neck. He was drowning and he didn’t want to stay afloat but a gentle push halted him. 

Gulf opened his eyes.

“I won’t be able to stop if you continue,” Mew said, cupping his face again. 

“Then don’t stop.” Gulf closed his eyes when he felt Mew gave him a light kiss and opened them again to see him smiling widely at him. 

“Hush, you sweet thing,” he chuckled. “Don’t rush. I won’t run away.”

Gulf couldn’t help the pout which made Mew laughed even more. His eyebrows were scrunching in defiance. “But P’Mew—”

Mew went for a hug that Gulf received quite swiftly. “Let’s sleep?” 

Gulf shook his head and Mew pulled away a bit to meet his eyes. “Let’s sleep, boyfriend?”

Gulf huffed and nodded and they both moved their positions to lie comfortably on the bed with Gulf’s arm outstretched on the wide expanse of Mew’s chest. 

Mew’s arm pillowed his head, and Gulf could not help hugging him tighter. 

“We are really, really boyfriends, P’?” He murmured against Mew’s chest, his head was tucked under Mew’s chin. 

“Really, really boyfriends, Nong.” He heard him say and Gulf smiled, wondering whose stars he got to give thanks to for giving him Mew. 

  


**Author's Note:**

> song they're dancing to in the ball: if this is love by ruth b.  
> also if you want a twt version of this (with pictures): go [here](https://twitter.com/gsuppawut/status/1248597077145186304)
> 
> thank you for reading!


End file.
